Would you rather have the money or the stuff? This is a question I often ask myself and my readers. The answer often comes down to a contest between sentimental value and market value ─ the old dilemma of heart versus head.

In these days of high gas prices and runaway inflation, the head wins. When people look around their homes to see what they could cash in, they often open the family cash box.

Margaret Ingraham, of Syracuse, New York, recently did just that. Now, if anyone has a reason to be sentimental about family silverware, it’s Ingraham. Her maternal grandfather worked for Oneida and her mother had a set of pounds from that company. Nevertheless, Ingraham, 58, cashed in the family money a few weeks ago.

“I had a lot of respect for my grandfather, and this silver medal was special for my mother, but there comes a time when you have to be honest,” she said. “I didn’t need it and the kids didn’t want it.”

I can’t argue with that.

Me, on the other hand, I fall into the sentimental camp. Although the Towle El Grandee (1964) Sterling is not a model I would have chosen, I am not ready to give up the money my mother left me. When I pull out this felt-lined box for a special occasion, I think of the beautiful tables Mom used to set for family vacations and the pride she had in owning sterling silver. (She put it under her bed to hide it from burglars.)

None of us are right anymore, but if you too have inherited the family silverware, you should know what you have and what it’s worth. However, before imagining a giant bargain, don’t base yourself on what the silver you own would cost new today, or even used.

“Although new sterling silver cutlery costs around $1,000 per cutlery, you can barely give it away used,” says Sandy Bourbonnais, owner of Silver Superstore, a Washington-based online and brick-and-mortar store, which she and her husband opened 23 years ago. “Everyone has sterling they want to sell, so unfortunately there’s an influx of used coins, which often sell for next to nothing.”

Ouch. To test his theory, I calculated the numbers using mom’s money as a base. I hope you are seated.

A new 46-piece set of Towle El Grandee sterling, which is still available, sells for $13,000, Bourbonnais told me. I mute my phone to cough. I have 52 pieces — 12 four-piece place settings, plus four serving pieces, which would drive that bill up to $14,000. Hold that thought.

A visit to Replacements, Ltd., a company that sells used silverware online, shows that I could pick up a 45-piece set of used El Grandee for just under $3,000, or about 75% less than new.

But, if I wanted to sell my set to a company to resell, Bourbonnais says, “You can only expect to get 15% to 20% of what they will sell it for.” Or, in my case, $500 to $600. This makes sense when you realize that resellers have to cover the costs of keeping merchandise in stock (sometimes for years), servicing, insuring, marketing and packaging it, all while making a profit. You can also try to sell it yourself, but good luck.

Thus, many instead sell their silver for its melting value. I took my silver safe to Orlando Estate Buyer in Winter Park, Florida where owner Daniel Montesi weighed it in troy ounces and based on the silver price of the day offered some buy for $1,300 ─ 1/10th of what it would cost new, and less than half of what it would cost used. And that’s how the world works.

Ingraham sold his silver, an assortment of about 40 coins, for cast value. She got $865 and split the money between her and her siblings. She used her share to pay a car bill.

“My grandfather grew up during the Depression. He, of all people, would understand,” she said.

Montesi thinks those who cling to their silverware for sentimental reasons are wrong. “When you take away the lie you’re telling yourself, it’s really not sad to sell if you want money.”

Meanwhile, silver curators like Martin Biro, co-owner of Biro & Sons Silversmiths in San Francisco, say, “For us, melting down sterling silver is like burning pounds or art.

So here is. Two sides of the silver dollar. Ultimately, the decision to hold or sell comes down to whether you want the cash or the cash. If you decide to keep it, here’s how to take care of it:

• Avoid the dishwasher. Sterling is best hand washed in warm soapy water. Dishwashers can tarnish silver because the alkaline in dish soap will cause it to lose its shine, Biro says. Newer dishwashers tend to be even harder on the money than older models. While hand washing is ideal, experts add, if it prevents you from using your silver more often, put it in the dishwasher. Use liquid detergent. If silver tarnishes, so what? It can be restored. “In the worst case, in 10 years, you have to take it to someone like me to fix it, and that’s okay,” adds Biro.

• Keep it cool and dry. Once washed and completely dried, store silverware in a flannel-lined box or in a drawer in a place where the temperature changes little, such as a dresser. Avoid garages or attics where extreme temperature changes will accelerate oxidation.

• Polish with paste. When your silver needs polishing, opt for a silver polish or paste that you rub and polish, says Biro. Avoid soak-in formulas or products that require immediate rinsing. Their acids can damage the finish.

• Use it. The best way to keep your silver from tarnishing is to use it. “If you’re lucky enough to have a set of pounds, use it every day,” says Bourbonnais. “Don’t wait for a special occasion.” Plus, experts agree that food tastes better with money.

Marni Jameson is the author of six home and lifestyle books including “What to Do With Everything You Own to Leave the Legacy You Want”, “Downsizing the Family Home – What to Save, What to Let Go” and “Downsizing the Blended Home – When Two Homes Become One. You can join her at marnijameson.com.